The Matter of Time

It has been a great deal of time since I have written here. There has been many attempts to add to my blog, that is to say I have quite a few drafts hidden away from you my dearest readers. I do not fool my self into thinking people have been waiting for my next post or that people check this regular. If that was so I would have many more followers and I would journal on here regularly. Still I wish to reconcile with you my few readers and post.

The journey, which is life, has been hard on all of us. Looking around the United States and all over the world for that matter, economies are not the strongest. The job market is not clamoring for fresh blood, old blood or even experienced blood. No the job market is like a famished child starving for the sustenance of new work. I myself continue my search for a job that can feed my soul, provide for my budding family and carry the weight of my college debt. Is there such a job for me, I do not know?

So I struggle, wrestle and fight with my emotions feeling like a failure unable to provide for my family, no in ministry and delaying my loans. I feel utterly defeated sometimes and even more so I feel as if I have missed out on my destiny. Still I know that I am not the only one struggling with such feelings. So here I sit typing out my thoughts to you the Internet knowing that the chance of reply or growth for my weird little piece of the blog-o-sphere in slim and none, a sounding board with no echo if you will.

I feel it is important anyway because who knows whom will stop by and be encouraged. Yes, encouraged because though I feel this way I have learned to put not stock in my emotions. Though they affect me there is bright beacon of hope in my heart, a shining light that is the creator of the universe. The great God of all and dwells in spirit with me because of Jesus.

It is this hope that pulls me out of this despair. I know right now I feel lost and fallen, that all my enemies surround me looking to gloat over their victory because of my shortcomings. In these times I cling on to the identity I know. That I am a son of the King and thus he has plans for me to prosper. It's only a matter of time.