Book Of Ezra

Ezra

Summary: The Book of Ezra focuses on the rebuilding the Temple in Jerusalem . This effort was commanded by the King Cyrus of Persia. Many people stood against this spreading lies against the remnant. Still God was faithful to help complete the task. Ezra help re-instituting the Priesthood and Torah Law, re-introducing the Passover. Like Nehemiah, Ezra help to segregate the Jewish blood line from being mixed with other races.

Things I Noticed:

1. Ezra kept good genealogical records. 

2. Ezra was known for his scribing and knowledge of Torah. 

3. Ezra always mentions God's hand being with him in any success.

4. Ezra spent a great deal of time searching for the Levitical blood line.

5. Like Nehemiah, Ezra felt obligated to segregate the blood as in the Torah law set down by God for entering the Promised land.

6. Ezra made sure the temple ran sacrifices and money offerings correctly.

7. Ezra had a high view of himself. (Ezra 7:6)

Well, that's my take on what I just finished reading. Now on to Haggai and Zechariah who was mentioned in this book. It is time to hear there account of this time as well. Till then, Read up, Post up, and Shalom.

Book Of Nehemiah

Nehemiah

Summary: The Book of Nehemiah focuses on the rebuilding of Jerusalem and her walls by the Jewish captives. This effort was lead by Nehemiah who is the cup bearer for King Artaxerxes. After gaining permission from the King, Nehemiah sets the task of rebuilding the Walls of Jerusalem, re-instituting the Torah Law, reforming the Priesthood, re-introducing the festival of booths, and segregating the Jewish blood line from being mixed with other races.

Things I Noticed:

1. Nehemiah fasted, prayed, and repented before doing anything.

2. Nehemiah had a clear desire to help his people rebuild.

3. Before rebuilding, Nehemiah surveyed the issues with the wall.

4. It took everyone helping with the work to complete the job. (One cannot fix issues on their own despite what we are taught in this world.)

5. People will stand against you and even lie about you if they find it is in their own interest, or they think they are stopping you from making a mistake.

6. Celebrate the Festivals.

7. Nehemiah, in his Zealousness to re-establish the Law of Torah, looked at Solomon and went to the extreme by segregating the Jewish people from marrying other people and races. (One must constantly seek God as not to be overrun by passion and zeal.)

Well, that's my take on what I just finished reading. Now on to Ezra who was mentioned in this book. It is time to hear his account of this time as well. Till then, Read up, Post up, and Shalom.

A Recap...

525,600 minutes is the time in a year. Don't believe me watch Rent.

How have I spent this last year? 

Staring at the mirror my white hair reminds me another year has gone. They year started turned upside down. I was still reeling from the lose of Tony Monge the man who was father and friend to me since I was three. Still January came and went the only people who stood by me was family, Fiancee, Jolab, Mark and Starla. 

Moving into February I renewed my search for a new job. Celebrating my first Valentines in a relationship Jules made it a wondrous event filled with good memories. It was a brief break from the turmoil of my soul. 

As time passed and we moved into March I began to make my plans to become engaged to Jules with the help of my friends Jolab and Brooke. This took time but plans where laid out and monies where set aside. It would be a grand event. March 25th came and again I was shaken to the core as my friend and brother Shane let this earth following the loss of this brother Jesse. 

To say my world was in retrograde would be and understatement. My world was headed for the sun and about to get worse. In April as time got close to my engagement plans Jules son Aaron went into emergency surgery to remove his appendix. After a botched surgery the road that unfolded to recovery was rough. It was during this time my Cousin Chris came into the picture to support me and Jules as we looked after our youngest as he fought back and recovered from this adversity. 

By the time we got to May I was not sure of anything. I had lost Shane, I had no real church family other then a few sparse friends, and Jules and I were stretched to the frayed points of emotion. Vegas came as a brief respite in the torrent of life. I still had no new job, but I had a ring and tax returns. Mark and Starla where our guides during this time and with their help and a few good times she said yes and I was an engaged man.

In June I got my own place. Moving out from the torrent of family affairs at my Moms and trying to prepare for a wedding this seemed logical. It was also during this time my hours at work dwindled to half of what they where. Now I was not only making under what I was worth but now with half a pay check. Birthday's came and went. Jules and I had a great one celebrating at the Magic Kingdom. It was good for such a tight month. 

July came and money for food was scarce but we made it. Sliding into August with a new schedule with the kids and a school for everyone. September came and went letting October rise up to allow me to celebrate Aaron's and Larrisa's Birthday while morning Tony. It ended with a bang as I took there kids trick or treating with my Sister and her clan. 

November came and thanksgiving was great spending time with my mom and then David, Jules' brother. It was during this time Czarah enter in as my new boss to smooth somethings out at work. Now we are caught into December and well looking back I have some great memories. 

This year has taught me to endure with more heartache then I could imagine. I had some great times of rest but to me the next year is so unclear. 

Still it is good I am able to recap. I think I might add and modify this later till then here is it in the raw...

Art In Motion

Blank.

A canvas or piece of paper starts this way. In is a place to drip color or words onto to as to portray something the artist finds significant. Emotions, ideas, concepts of imaginations taking root on something to be refined. This can be poetry, stories, songs, pictures you name it the possibilities are endless.

Whats even more curious is when the canvas of such work is made of something used. Paper bags, pizza box, piece of cardboard, a dirty wall, stained cloth these things can and have been used to create art and bring purpose forth dreams.

Why do I bring this up?

Because Jesus does the same thing with the Human Soul. It is interesting how much we are like the creator. Using discarded, broken or damaged items to bring forth beauty to all who see it. If you think about it with a few cans of paint God can change the tagging on a persons soul to beautiful graffiti art. With the stroke of a pen he can change the words on the paper of our mind to something we could never imagine.

Just a thought...

It might be time to draw ink from my bones and write again.

I would not go so far as to say that the time of grieving has passed. True grief only finds a low hum in one's soul. Yet I find that you must look back at what is lost and hold on tight to the memory while continuing to move ahead. Your loved ones would not want you to stop, for they wait for you at the end of the race. As a man of faith I am sure I will see those again who I lost almost a year ago. Right now I have realized how much the loss of them has truly affected me.

I guess the best way to discribe it is that I went from a world of wonderful color to seeing things in grey, black and white. It is like moving but going nowhere. Looking deep at my past entries most of which are not published I have come to a point where I find I must change. It is inevitable.  Being changed can happen in a blink of an eye whether you chose to or not.

I know I am forever scared by my recent loss and will look at the world with one eye in black and white and try to regain color in the other. This is of course figurative but I hope you can understand the illusion I am making. I don't expect all of you to relate, but some will. All truths are revealed through experiences and some of those are pains, in that we can empathize or relate.

On the road that we call living one must move forward. The past will always be there like a scarp book of memories and whats more our hearts find it hard to forget love. Tony was the father I never had in my life. He taught me to play baseball, to fish, about being a man of honor and not letting people get to me. He was my Dad though he would never let me call him that. In the last year he was here with me we talked about Jesus and the end times. We worried together about my mom and my sister. We laughed and he saw me skydive indoors. Shane was my brother. No other way to describe him. Together we conquered armies, aliens and we walked through each others women problems. He taught me that life can begin anew after a great pain. In Las Vegas we had adventures and in life we shared our thoughts and dreams. Shane helped me with my writing and geeked-out with me on things from Mac product to Steam Punk guns. When I lost Tony he was there, and I was there as he lost Jesse. When his light fade so quickly after his brother the hole inside me turned into a chasm.

The Grand Canyon will never be filled and I have accepted the hole Tony and Shane left will not be filled either. Still like the Grand Canyon there is beauty there that is breath-takingly-painful. So I move on. I have been changed by life and loss. Now for the sake of those I love who are around me I forge all this experience into something useful. I am the heated metal in the tongs of the Great Smith. Keep watching as I am about to be made anew by God again. I believe some wondrous metamorphosis is about to occur. It does not mean I will forget or stop missing them. I just means I carry them with me till I see them again. All the good and the pain of the loss. Beauty from Ash. It's like phoenix rising...

Passing on Life.

At school I learned about mind, body and soul. Life has taught me a weak heart, leads to a weak mind and both lead to a weak physical frame. All this theological jargon is to say I caught a cold. It is funny that this cold would give my soul some clarity. I meditated on my thoughts last night and opened the Word to think on hope. It was Peter who wanted to speak to me on the subject. So I sat down and listened and here is where we started.

(1Peter 3:15) "...but in your hearts regard Christ the Lord as Holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you." It was a strong first comment to say the least. And having it come from Peter, well the brash voice of the apostles always seems to have a curious smile like he knows more then he is letting on. So he let me talk.

"Why is that sometimes I have do find defend against my own heart? The world pounds down causing a tsunami of emotion that seems to drown out the logic and truth in my faith. Is this a testing of my mettle? To show me my faith."

Looking at him I continued. "Jewish thought on faith is standing rooted, unmovable like a tree. So in testing we find how deep our roots go. Still what is there to learn if testing does not lead to a brief intermission of rest. We sat silent Peter and I the Holy Spirit lighting the small room in my heart with his presence. I looked at my teachers and smiled."

(1Peter 1:3-9) "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God's power are being guarded though faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith-more precious then gold that perishes though it is tested by fire-may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Though you have not seen him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls." His response sent me back to thinking.

I felt the deep stir of that living hope. A fire if you will. The room seemed a bit brighter as I stared at my teachers. Peter seems to have the look like me griping his words was funny. Or maybe it was like seeing a son learn a truth and doing his Father proud I could not tell. The Holy Spirit just tussled my hair as I sat there silently. Jacob (who most people call James) had taught me about taking trials and tribulations with Joy. Peter seemed to want to build on the block; it was the growing living hope that grew inside us every time we made it through another hardship. In that experience our worship turned into something that much sweeter to the ears of heaven. It was true I felt that hope stir even in the depths of my angst in the last few days. All the loss I have experienced and all the good times just made me glad that there are still things I can learn. Knowledge I can pass on. Still this hope has changed me.

I turned my gaze back to Peter and began to think aloud again. "This hope is a gift that endures past this life. Trials are walking with Jesus through hardship helps it grow, change and evolve. I can look back now and see that in the past I would have fallen sulking in my trail and using sin to nurse me. Yet, now the light of hope inside me spurs me to do more, to get up and praise walking forward triumphant. "

The Holy Spirit and Peter both burst into laughing. It was awkward but when they reined it in the both smiled. "Yes you go it. It does our hearts good to know you our child are doing well and are learning much."

With that I got up to leave as I walked to the door I turned around. "Thanks, its time for me to share more. I said."

The Matter of Time

It has been a great deal of time since I have written here. There has been many attempts to add to my blog, that is to say I have quite a few drafts hidden away from you my dearest readers. I do not fool my self into thinking people have been waiting for my next post or that people check this regular. If that was so I would have many more followers and I would journal on here regularly. Still I wish to reconcile with you my few readers and post.

The journey, which is life, has been hard on all of us. Looking around the United States and all over the world for that matter, economies are not the strongest. The job market is not clamoring for fresh blood, old blood or even experienced blood. No the job market is like a famished child starving for the sustenance of new work. I myself continue my search for a job that can feed my soul, provide for my budding family and carry the weight of my college debt. Is there such a job for me, I do not know?

So I struggle, wrestle and fight with my emotions feeling like a failure unable to provide for my family, no in ministry and delaying my loans. I feel utterly defeated sometimes and even more so I feel as if I have missed out on my destiny. Still I know that I am not the only one struggling with such feelings. So here I sit typing out my thoughts to you the Internet knowing that the chance of reply or growth for my weird little piece of the blog-o-sphere in slim and none, a sounding board with no echo if you will.

I feel it is important anyway because who knows whom will stop by and be encouraged. Yes, encouraged because though I feel this way I have learned to put not stock in my emotions. Though they affect me there is bright beacon of hope in my heart, a shining light that is the creator of the universe. The great God of all and dwells in spirit with me because of Jesus.

It is this hope that pulls me out of this despair. I know right now I feel lost and fallen, that all my enemies surround me looking to gloat over their victory because of my shortcomings. In these times I cling on to the identity I know. That I am a son of the King and thus he has plans for me to prosper. It's only a matter of time.